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Postby Aywen » 11 Aug 2016 19:14

Muppet wrote:
daerek wrote:Aywen and Muppet, I wrote up a big reply post, but then the site decided to log me out and delete what I had written. I'll just do a summary.

I've actually been having a lot of trouble lately with this forum also. It keeps timing out, the connection before i even reach here. Something to do with the server not being able to connect or isn't reachable/responding. So i know exactly what you mean as it happened to me too while trying to post and i lost huge chunks of replies also.

Same here! Well, almost. Haven't lost any text but it's taking ages to load. I copy-paste my replies in notepad before hitting 'submit' just in case.

Muppet wrote:How do i feel?
I don't want to depress anyone so i'll just say, "I'm well, thank you" and smile, like always when i am in bad shape!
:)

:hug

daerek wrote:Aywen, my mother has been completely supportive of me from day one, and she's more of a mother to my boyfriend than his own ever was. The three of us live together now, in my mother's house. He's actually happy here, for the first time in his life.

This brought tears to my eyes. I don't need much to grab for a tissue these days, but still. It's so sad that he's never been happy, but so beautiful that he is now :)

By the way, do you remember I drew a portrait of you? Would you like me to give it another try?
(Yes I admit, I'm super curious what you look like and I want to show off :lol: I won't be upset when you say no)
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Postby Muppet » 12 Aug 2016 08:59

Aywen wrote:Same here! Well, almost. Haven't lost any text but it's taking ages to load. I copy-paste my replies in notepad before hitting 'submit' just in case.

I now do the same if i know it is going to be a log post!
:lol:

I've been having trouble since i was in Europe and it has never been the same since.
Titi helped me through it though, but i have no idea what's going on.
I guess the forum is testing us by making us REALLY work to post here...
How much do we REALLY want it!?!
:lol: :lol: :lol:


Anneke wrote: :hug

Thank you.
:hug


How am i feeling?
I'm well.
:)
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Postby Muppet » 14 Aug 2016 20:17

Thierry wrote:Muppet:

Muppet wrote: I don't care if it is gas... IT'S A SMILE DAMN IT!


IT IS!!!! :D :P

Hope things will work out for Asi! (Like in "Asi... Alien Drum Bunny"?) :hug

You're definitely not an "Ice Queen", that woman was just nuts! And about believing in curses... I don't know, my rational self would say "of course no!" but there's something inside of me that believes in this kind of things. Maybe I would go to a marabout to get rid of anything placed on you? ^^

I missed this Titi, sorry!
:P

And Asi is short for Aslan. Like the Lion from Narnia. I should find and post a picture of Asi as he is a huge pure bred white German Shepard. He is a stunning animal and such a big, cuddly, softie. He looks like a dog version of a polar bear!!!
:lol:

All my brother's pets are named after leaders, real or fictional.... Aslan, Napoleon and Winston.
:lol:

As for that lady and her curse, she was strange and had a lot of problems mentally/physically. Being one of the ones in charge, i had to constantly pull her up and correct the things she would do. No matter how politely or gently i went about it, she didn't like being corrected and i suspect that was due to her having a life time of hardship with people teasing/mocking her. I was simply trying my best to stop her from getting fired as it came close sooooooooooo many times as she DID need help and constant supervision. I guess it gets to a stage where she thought the whole world was against her regardless of how genuine or kind someone was to her.
*sigh*

I don't believe in curses BUT i also don't think people should be dealing them out. Just like i am careful with what i wish for and so on. I'll have to look into it. It's obviously playing on my mind if i bought it up.
:roll

I had an ex friend in high school curse me too... She even had a picture of me up in her bedroom with pins stuck all through it. In my eyes and all over my face. She did a skeleton through out my body with pins... Again, she was going through a rough time as she was coming to terms with being a lesbian BUT she became jealous when i became closer with another group of friends over media studies and photography so we spent less time hanging out. I had no idea she had THOSE feelings for me though as i had no idea she was a lesbian. No one did until after high school. She called me Baby Blue because of my eyes and always used to sing that Elton John song around/to me, Blue Eyes.

Has anyone else ever had all this shit go on in their life? Curses and such hate/anger towards them? IT CAN'T BE JUST ME!!!
*hides face*
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Postby Jarhara » 17 Aug 2016 20:01

I am back from my vacation and i feel so glad i finally got to go there again...
i just have so many childhood memories conected to the house we stayed in, as we've been there 4 times by now.. but the last time was 10 years ago and i was so afraid that the house might have changed or, worse, that i had changed and i wouldn't like it anymore.. that all that i loved about this house were just idolized memories.. but i feel so glad that i was wrong to fear...
this was such a strange feeling......

oh.. i am getting so sentimental now...

this little, old house in sweden realy has a special place in my heart, i litteraly cryed tears of happienes, the first evening there....

now, i don't want to bother you too much with my talk about some old vacation home and i still have some stuff to do that piled up while i was gone...
But befor i go, here is a picture of the view from the livingroom (a.k.a. my bedroom) of this house
Image
i hope this makes you at least kind of understand why i love this house, without hearing the whole story (that i am to tired to tell, now)
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Postby Thierry » 18 Aug 2016 23:38

Nice view indeed! :)

Ness: don't be upset about the card, just do things when you are able to :) :hug
Never had such anger towards me... or at least I think. I suppose one of my ex's could have wanted to cast bullshit on me, if she did, she wasn't powerful enough :P

Anneke: I would have gone mad at the neighbour, I suppose...
And no, you're still a girl! You have boobs, I don't! :P
.

How do I feel? Hot, though the weather has been a bit more bearable today.
Maybe it's better for you, mankind, not to know what's going on!

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Postby Muppet » 21 Aug 2016 18:15

Jarhara, that place looks wonderfully peaceful. I can understand why you were so eager to return and had hopes that it had remained the same both physically and emotionally for you.

Titi, thanks! I'll try get to it this week because i'm finally feeling stronger and have such a HUGE hunger! All of a sudden it's like my body needs to replenish the months of energy spent in agony.
I don't really know why it is, but i do, quite often, bring out the worst in people. Maybe it is my compassionate/soft/open nature that when i finally say no or stand up to someone, they just unleash on me.
*shrugs*

ANYWAYS, moving along. I can't sleep. I fell asleep early, around 9pm and was woken by my dog at 11:38. I've been awake since. It's now 4:13am and he is off in the lounge sprawled out and fast asleep and has been for hours... BUT I STILL LOVE HIM!!!
:lol: :lol: :lol:

But i'm feeling better pain wise, just drained. Got a lot of 'rest' to catch up on for my body. I also feel like a HUGE weight has been lifted from me this week. Just the last day or so. I'm happy and smiley again. Just free and cleansed.
<3
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Postby Muppet » 24 Aug 2016 10:00

Cold!
I feel like i climbed out of bed this morning and into a fridge!
I even had to get a thin sheet of ice off my car this morning.
I haven't had to do that in a while.
I know for you lot that live with sub zero temps during Winter are most likely chuckle under your breath BUT it was cold for me that i even took a picture in the car of the Temp!
:lol:

Image

Otherwise i am FINALLY starting to feel good, physically.
My right leg is slowly getting a bit stronger but it is extremely slow going and all the extra fluid from all the pills i am taking, doesn't help much other than easing the agonising nerve pain and makes me feel like an overripe watermelon about to split!
:lol:

Totally decompressed emotionally now and so clear and focused.
I've had my melt down over the last 2 weeks.
BUT it has been such a huge fog that has been lifted, cleaning all the negative out and all of a sudden even my aches don't ache as much which goes to show stress and bad energy does effect our health. Or mine at least. These last 3-4 weeks have been filled with hideousness.

Oh and Titi, i spoke to a spiritual healer yesterday. She gave me some sound advice. So onward and upward for me it is!
:cheer <3
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Postby Thierry » 24 Aug 2016 11:08

Good move! :)

Time to get rid of all the bad energy indeed! :) Your body is starting to benefit from it, as it seems :)

And... 37°C in here, I'm melting! (Well, not that much, luckily our new house is waaay better isolated than our previous one.)


To bounce back on the "no, it's not a gas :P ", OK, now it's definitely not a gas. Eléa's smiling when she's in our arms and sticking her head against ours. <3

She's changed so much over the past week, that's incredible.
Maybe it's better for you, mankind, not to know what's going on!

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Postby Muppet » 24 Aug 2016 11:18

Thierry wrote:Good move! :)

Thank you, indeed!
:hug

And that IS hot.
*sending cool thoughts your way*

Titi wrote:Eléa's smiling when she's in our arms and sticking her head against ours. <3

She's changed so much over the past week, that's incredible.

That is so precious.
You just wait until she says Dadda or what would it be in French?
:-P

And are you doing a month by month photo album thing?
:)

I did it for my nephew and gave it as a gift to his parents from the day he was born, how he changed every month over his first year in a big photo frame to hang for his 1st birthday week. Then made a separate one for all our family as a calendar gift too. He had a photo shoot on the 9th of every month. He was born on the 9th of April!
:P

Yes, i'm one of THOSE Aunts!
:lol: :P
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Postby Thierry » 24 Aug 2016 11:23

We take a lot of pictures indeed, and Aurélie classifies them on her PC. Which led us to some stress as last week the thing crashed and had to be brought to a specialist. (False alert)

We take videos as well :) Also for my family who still hasn't seen her in real.

And in French that would be "Papa" :D
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Postby Muppet » 24 Aug 2016 11:29

OMG i bet your hearts were in your throats!
*hides face*

I know that sounds drastic but seriously, that would be heart breaking if you lost those precious first moments.

I'm guessing lot's of backups now?
:lol:

And Papa! Of course! I did French, i should have remembered that!
:P
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Postby Muppet » 25 Aug 2016 13:35

How do i feel?

Cold and hungry.

But i'm about to go to bed, so no food and no need to turn the heating on.

Otherwise i had a lovely day.

Feeling stronger too. Little by little, i'll get there!
:wink:
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Postby daerek » 26 Aug 2016 21:27

Muppet, we're definitely being realistic about things - I'm not expecting him to run any marathons. If he doesn't get help now, he'll most likely end up in a wheelchair in a few years, so we're hoping to at least avoid that.

Aywen wrote:This brought tears to my eyes. I don't need much to grab for a tissue these days, but still. It's so sad that he's never been happy, but so beautiful that he is now :)

By the way, do you remember I drew a portrait of you? Would you like me to give it another try?
(Yes I admit, I'm super curious what you look like and I want to show off :lol: I won't be upset when you say no)
It's really sad. I wish we had gotten to know each other many years ago, so I could have been there for him at his worst.

I'll probably post a picture sometime, feel free to draw when I do. Or we could add each other on Facebook?
Meow.
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Postby Aywen » 27 Aug 2016 06:43

I can imagine and this will probably always hurt. But you can't undo the past sadly. :( I hope the hip thing can be helped! Even if it won't improve much, if it doesn't get worse, it's still a win.

You can add me :-) let me know if you can't find me, I'll send you a link. There are more people called Anneke de Waard and most seem to be in their fifties :lol:
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Postby Muppet » 27 Aug 2016 07:48

daerek wrote:Muppet, we're definitely being realistic about things - I'm not expecting him to run any marathons. If he doesn't get help now, he'll most likely end up in a wheelchair in a few years, so we're hoping to at least avoid that.

That's awesome to read. Sending all the very best energies his way. I hope there is a resolution for him.

My little break through came in the form of a book in a charity store from the 70's... It took almost 14 years before i found it BUT it gave me the greatest relief and strength i have ever experience with this injury of mine. Back to basics.

Hopefully he finds something soon too... It is long overdue for him!
:hug

I must admit ending up in a wheelchair is a fear i have. I know there are worse things in life BUT there is something so beautiful about being able to use your legs. I've just recently had days i couldn't walk without help but then the day i COULD, i cried in the rain as a walked because it felt SOOOOOOO GOOOOOOOOOOD to be able to walk again without assistance.

I still have dreams of running in the forest and dancing. I always wake up in tears, even all these years later as it always feels so real that it WON'T let me forget how it used to be. I know i should be grateful i got to do all that but sometimes i wonder if i didn't know what i was missing, might i be better off? I don't think it is something people can truly understand or appreciate unless they are going through it and even then, it is always different as everyone's pain is their own.
:cry:


How do i feel today?
Sleeping A LOT which is great.
I'm loving it!
My right leg is slowly getting stronger.
My pain levels are still going down too.
The weather was wonderful and sunny but so cold that i got half way to the beach and then turned around and went for a walk in the park instead as the beach would be freezing with the wind. I'm a little over all the cold. So no photos people, sorry!

Otherwise i'm about to start making some steamed fish and veggies for dinner UNLESS a certain someone calls me in the next 20 minutes to tell me he is coming over for a movie and pizza!
:)
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Postby Aywen » 28 Aug 2016 19:01

Super tired but I have been very busy this weekend! I feel like I need another weekend to recharge :lol:
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Postby Muppet » 29 Aug 2016 10:54

Being that busy is awesome though!
That's like really active vacations.
You need a holiday from the holiday.
:lol:

How do i feel today?
Happy.
Some minor improvements but as long as i improve, i'm happy.
:)
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Postby Jarhara » 30 Aug 2016 14:47

How do i feel today?
what should i say.... i am disapointed in my local hardware store, as they still don't have the paint i need...
and then, a co worker made a stupid jock about me that i took a little to personal but it realy hurt my feelings and now i feel like... well, like a Scarecrow....
I'm just another Scarecrow
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Postby Aywen » 30 Aug 2016 20:15

Jarhara wrote:and then, a co worker made a stupid jock about me that i took a little to personal but it realy hurt my feelings and now i feel like... well, like a Scarecrow....

I'm sorry to hear that :( Do you think he meant to hurt you? Maybe he was only trying to joke but it came out in a bad way.
I have discussed this kind of thing with my career coach and her advise was: don't react emotionally but do explain to him how you are feeling. Because he can't see inside your head and he doesn't know how you feel. So explain calmly that you don't like what he said to you.
I don't know if you should do this. I know I don't... I never know what to say in the heat of the moment, and it feels bad to start about it later. But maybe it helps you :)
How is your job now, by the way? I hope things improved a bit for you.

I'm doing okay. I was tired and in a bad mood, but later in the afternoon I was feeling better.
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Postby Jarhara » 31 Aug 2016 03:56

Aywen wrote:I'm sorry to hear that :( Do you think he meant to hurt you? Maybe he was only trying to joke but it came out in a bad way.


that's how it happend, like i said, i took his joke to personal. he doesn't real care about me that much, but i was shure he didn't ment it

Aywen wrote:don't react emotionally but do explain to him how you are feeling. Because he can't see inside your head and he doesn't know how you feel. So explain calmly that you don't like what he said to you.

that's what i did, but only later. at first i couldn't take it and whent away from him untill i was calmer

and for my job, yes, i am back in my old workshop and i can do real work again^^
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